Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Ho Hum

Well I been feeling really up and down lately. I was weighed and measured at Curves on Monday morning and I have lost 2.7kg in 3 weeks and lost 9cm off my body. I have been feeling good about my weight loss and size 16 pants and size 12 swimmers but alas I still feel like crap. I have been starting to feel depressed and down in the dumps again. I know I have been taking on too much but I don't have much choice at the moment between work, losing weight/going to pool and curves, uni work and rallying as well as trying to keep my home life together. Its a thin line no matter what way I look. Sometimes I feel like a failure that I don't have kids (despite some trying), I didn't go to uni out of school, I don't have my dream job any more, I don't have much savings, I don't have a close relationship with my brother or many of my relatives at all. I haven't lost as much weight as I would have liked. I think sometimes my expectations of my self are too high and I am setting myself up for failure. I am going to see my GP on Friday so I might see about getting some therapy again..........just so I can have someone else tell me I am crazy and insane.

Sunday, April 26, 2009


Well as I told you the other day I have gone from a size 22 pants to a size 16. Well now I have gone from a size 18 swimmers to size 12. So as well as buying 2 pairs of swimmers in size 12, I have also bought some hand paddles that apparently will work my arms when I am swimming and help burn more fat. Food is going ok, but other things in life not that good. Kira my youngest dog started coughing and vomiting Friday afternoon. We took her to the emergency vet on Saturday morning and she was diagnosed with having a strain of Kennel cough that isn't covered by the vaccination that dogs are given. So having a miserable puppy with doggie flu that doesn't like having her cough medicine and is so short of breath she can go far without coughing is not a good way to spend your weekend. Suzie so far we think has escaped it. I have been doing some of my uni assignment in between comforting Kira and keeping Suzie still so she doesn't hype Kira up. Also haven't been sleeping well as I am so worried about Kira, I have also been sleeping on the couch as she finds it easier jumping up on that, not so good for mum to sleep on, oh well things you do for your kids!!

Thursday, April 23, 2009

Size 16 pants here I am

Well I have finally got some new pants for work and they are a 16. A little tight but bugger me they do up without the aid of someone else. I have been to Curves and the pool today and can definitely tell the weather is getting cooler as it gets a little chilly getting out of the pool. I will hopefully be getting some more swimmers this weekend and some other stuff so that will be good. Food has been a little bit of an issue this week but I am trying to improve bit by bit. A girl I know that was banded the same day as me rang me the other day in a little bit of a state as she has been struggling with no restriction and slow weight loss. It made me think that I am going ok and I am doing better than others in the same boat. I know I can still improve by a long way but I am somewhat on my way.

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Back in the swing of things

Well I am going back to the gym and pool regime tomorrow after a week and a half off. It is going to be hard getting up early again after all these days of sleeping in. I am going to try hard and be under 90kg by the end of May. More of a post when I find the motivation too.

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

15kg down and another charm

Well I have bought the charm for my 15kg of weight loss. I have bought a nut as in a nut and bolt for my dad, he is a fitter and turner and is very handy as a fix it man. He is very supportive and proud of me for what I have done and how fun I have come. My husband and I had lunch with my parents yesterday and I managed to find a nurses hat charm that I had been looking for everywhere. So I got that to represent my mum and now the cross I have is for me to have faith in myself and faith that I can do this.

Sunday, April 12, 2009

Nearly 15kg gone nearly a 1/3 of the way to my goal

Well I have nearly lost 15kg which means I have about 30kg to go. I have been banded just under 7 months. I saw friends of mine last night that I hadn't seen since Australia Day and they couldn't stop commenting how good I look. A friend of mine that was against me having it done in the first place was there and she said she was very proud of me that I hadn't just been relying on the band to get me through that I had been going to Curves and the pool 5 days a week. She is a State and National level swimmer and also has a certificate in personal training. She is also thinking of joining me at the pool in the mornings with Vennice so that will be good to have someone with us that has a clue. Another plus is she makes swimwear and also stocks other swimming stuff as well.

At the moment food is a bit of a bugger, some foods I can eat like a champion and other foods I eat as much as a fussy 2 year old. I am trying to eat health stuff. I try and eat the protein content first before the other stuff so if the rest doesn't go down at least I have some goodness. For the next week is going to be a challenge as I will be busy organising, running and participating in a car rally at Lithgow surrounded by boys that that eat and drink as much as a small American state. I don't drink so I am the permanent designated driver and mother hen. I know I will have a ball and they all know I have a band and they are all somewhat understanding as much as boys can be.

Other issues lately have been UNI work that has somewhat been very lax. I haven't been feeling very motivated and now it is biting me in the arse. I haven't been feeling motivated about other stuff as well such as housework and other relationships, but I guess they are all a work in progress.

Friday, April 3, 2009

What a week......

What a week.....well this week has been very up and down and up and down and you get the picture.

Tuesday I started at Edgeworth Curves, love it. It is different to what I know but that is good and the staff are very hands on and push you to push yourself.

Wednesday went to Neurologist for the follow up after a MRI I had a while ago because I am a klutz. He is thinking I have a VERY mild form of cerebral palsy that wasn't diagnosed as a child and its the only thing he can use to explain my symptoms at the moment, so I need to see a physio for some balance exercises and really try hard to increase my core strength and stability. That night I went to my Central Coast Weight loss Surgery Support Group meeting. Despite nearly having an accident and getting washed away on the free way from the rain I made it and I enjoyed it. We spent time talking about our exercise regimes and some of the issues people have with their kids and relationships with the people around them.

Thursday, nothing much out of the ordinary, gym, pool, work, and beauticians. Home, dinner Bed.

Today is my last Friday at Lambton Family Medical Centre and my 2ND last day working there, so it is sad because I love everything about the place EXCEPT the company that owns us.

Primary Health Care YOU SUCK and I wish you would just curl up in a ball and go away. Ahh that feels better.

Hope all is well in everyone else's world and I will attempt to post some more stuff tonight.